Jade Small
Jade Small
October 19, 2024 ·  4 min read

The quiet, searing pain of having one of your best friends move far away from you.

Lately, my thoughts have been consumed by the imagery of eggs and baskets, reflecting on the delicate balance of relationships. I find myself pondering whether I’ve invested too much into a single, overflowing basket. This introspection deepened yesterday when one of my closest friends boarded a plane, embarking on a new adventure in a place where I won’t be a regular presence. She’s settling into a world where her favorite coffee shop will be unfamiliar to me, her home a distant spot I won’t casually drop by, and her workplace a backdrop to her life that I’ll merely pass by when she feels bored—or perhaps, when I do.

A Grief for What Isn’t Lost

It’s intriguing how one can feel grief for something that hasn’t truly been lost. My friend is just a phone call away and will always be a message away. We will visit each other, maintaining our connection, and I’m confident she’ll remember my coffee order, even if it changes. Yet, at just 23 years old, I find myself wrestling with the paradox of our deep friendship. Is it a remarkable blessing, or a heavy burden? Strong connections inevitably bring the pain of distance when someone moves away—and she’s moving quite far.

The Ripple Effect of Change

The reality of her departure hit me when I started sharing the news. I could feel the weight of the situation every time I mentioned it to colleagues, family, or even my hairdresser. Each enthusiastic remark about her big move was tinged with an uncomfortable knot in my stomach. I found myself wondering, what happens next? I often joke that losing her will feel akin to a significant romantic relationship ending. This jest masks the reliance I have on her presence, her kindness, her laughter, and the little moments we share.

Navigating Long-Distance Friendship

How does friendship endure when faced with the challenge of distance? The simplest answer is that it simply does. Bonds formed in love and trust can withstand geographical barriers. These connections allow us to explore new territories while still holding onto each other. However, the part of me that is hesitant and afraid struggles to embrace this challenge. It feels daunting to navigate a friendship across miles and time zones.

Friendship as a Lifeline

In the strange, transitional phase of early adulthood—when romantic relationships are still developing and family might feel distant—friendship often becomes the anchor. For many, friends are the emotional support systems, the ones who offer a listening ear and share in our journey. During my brightest days and the darker moments, my friendships have been a source of strength. It’s the close-knit group of women around me who have lifted me up when I felt overwhelmed. Their understanding of our shared experiences provides warmth through their words, visits, and shared laughter.

The Power of Female Connections

As women, we often navigate societal expectations that encourage us to embrace our emotions, share our vulnerabilities, and support one another. We have forged strong bonds built on shared experiences and open communication. We’ve cried together, celebrated together, and continuously uplift one another. I believe that despite the challenges of distance and differing time zones, these connections remain intact. We adjust, we adapt, and we continue to nurture our relationships, knowing that many people share similar experiences of love across miles.

Embracing Change with Open Arms

As my thoughts drift back to the eggs and baskets metaphor, I’ve come to a comforting realization: perhaps there’s nothing wrong with investing heavily in a few meaningful relationships. Even if one friend moves away, the basket isn’t empty. It’s simply that she’s taking a portion of it with her for now.

Conclusion: A Full Basket of Friendship

Ultimately, the essence of friendship lies in its resilience. Even when distance stretches between us, our connections can remain strong. I trust that my friend and I will adapt to this new chapter, proving that love and friendship can transcend any physical barrier. Our friendship is like a basket filled with eggs—though some may be far away, the majority remain, waiting for us to reunite and create new memories together.

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