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Jade Small
Jade Small
February 7, 2023 ·  3 min read

His Wife Refused To Pay Off His Student Loans With A Large Inheritance, So He Took Action

Money has a tendency to make everything complicated. One Reddit user took to the “Am I the A**hole” thread to find out if he had overreacted to his wife. She had just inherited a whole lot of money, but refused to pay off his student loans. The husband then took subsequent action that infuriated the situation more. In the end, he asked the sub-Reddit platform whether or not he had reacted within reason. Or, if he was the a**hole.

To pay his student loan, or not to

One Reddit user is facing a perplexing family dilemma. He has been supporting his wife and children since their marriage began. His wife, a stay-at-home mom spends her time looking after their house and caring for their children. As the breadwinner, he pays for everything. On top of it all, he still has crippling amounts to pay back his student loan. “My wife is a SAHM for our 2 kids and I work as the sole income provider for the whole family,” he wrote on the Am I the A**hole sub-Reddit platform.

She refused to pay his student loans
Image credit: Pexels

The Reddit user explained that he is slowly paying back his debt, which is more than anyone can do. But, a spanner was thrown into the works when his wife inherited a large sum of money from her family. This sparked some hope in the Reddit user. “I am working slowly to pay back my student loan. My wife recently received a relatively large inheritance, 5x the amount of my student loan,” he wrote.

Wife refuses to pay the student loan

He was extremely hopeful that this money could set their family in a better financial position. So, one month after the money was settled, he asked if she would be willing to pay off his student loans. “A month after everything regarding the inheritance was settled, I talked to my wife about using some of the money to settle my student loans,” he wrote on Reddit.

Unfortunately, she was not as excited about the prospect of her husband being student loan free. She said it was her money, and no one else’s. He wrote: “She refused to give me any of the money and said the inheritance belongs only to her.

He tried to reason with her, explaining it would set them on a better financial path. But, she disagreed and said his student loans were his responsibility as they existed before marriage. As a result, the husband took some drastic measures. He cut his wife from any spending that was only meant for her. In his eyes, she had said his student loan was his responsibility alone. So, he refused to buy anything for her that wasn’t for their whole family. That meant no more clothes, lunch dates, salon trips, or anything. His question for Reddit users was whether or not he reacted accordingly.

Is he the a**hole?

Usually, it is clear when one person is an a**hole. The responses from Reddit say it all. In this case, however, both parties were deemed at fault. The vast majority of comments showed that people agreed with both the husband and the wife. However, there are some who sided with the wife vehemently. One person commented that the husband is abusing his position of power as the income earner. They also added, “Unless you’re paying her a salary for watching the children, then she is enabling you to make your salary and is entitled to money too.”

Am I the Asshole?
Image credit: Pexels

Another person sided with the husband. They wrote: “If I am in a happy marriage with a good husband and father to my kids then darn right I’m paying that debt off. It would feel awesome to do something like that for someone I love.”

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Attention: These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.


  1. Husband Said No To Wife’s Personal Expenses After She Got A Huge Inheritance, But Didn’t Want To Share It To Pay Off His Student Loans.Bored Panda. Robertas Lisickis. 2022
  2. Man Demanding Wife Use Inheritance To Pay His Student Debt Divides Internet.Newsweek. Jack Beresford. May 27, 2022.