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Jade Small
Jade Small
March 24, 2025 ·  7 min read

How to Tell If Your Child Is Being Cyberbullied

Cyberbullying is silent and often invisible. It happens behind screens, where adults can’t always see the damage. Kids rarely speak up. Many feel embarrassed, ashamed, or afraid of making it worse. That’s why parents need to spot the signs. By paying attention, you can step in before lasting harm is done.

Sudden Changes in Mood After Using Devices

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A sudden shift in mood after screen time is a major red flag. If your child seems frustrated, anxious, or sad right after texting or scrolling, don’t ignore it. They may have seen a cruel message or been excluded from a group chat. Their reaction could range from snapping at you to storming off without a word. Watch for body language: slamming phones, sighing heavily, or going quiet all say something’s wrong. Ask calmly if something happened online. The goal isn’t to lecture—just to open the door to trust.

Avoidance of Social Media or Online Platforms

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If your child used to love social media but suddenly stops posting, it’s worth asking why. Avoiding apps they once enjoyed is often a coping response to bullying. They may be trying to distance themselves from people who hurt them or escape spaces where they’ve been humiliated. This can look like deleting accounts, changing usernames, or refusing to post altogether. It might even seem like they’re becoming more private. But sometimes, they’re just trying to stay safe.

Reluctance to Go to School

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Bullying doesn’t stay online—it often continues in hallways and classrooms. If your child suddenly hates school, something bigger may be going on. Complaints of stomachaches, headaches, or vague illnesses can be a way to avoid that environment. They may dread facing classmates who’ve spread rumors or seen embarrassing posts. A once-eager student might start faking sick or begging to stay home. Talk to them gently and check in with teachers or counselors. Don’t just assume it’s laziness or drama.

Read More: Australian Senate Approves Social Media Ban for Under-16s

Secretive Behavior Around Screens

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Most kids want privacy, but secrecy is different. If your child hides their screen when you walk in or quickly changes tabs, pay attention. They might be afraid you’ll see hurtful messages or reactions from others. They may also fear losing phone privileges if you find out what’s happening. Instead of reacting with suspicion, show interest without hovering. Ask them to tell you about the apps they use or who they follow. Keep the tone casual—you’re trying to build safety, not fear.

Difficulty Sleeping or Changes in Sleep Patterns

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Sleep disruption is a common sign of stress. If your child struggles to fall asleep or wakes frequently, something could be weighing on them. Cyberbullying can cause racing thoughts, fear, or even nightmares. Some kids stay up too late refreshing notifications, terrified of what might come next. Others oversleep to avoid dealing with their emotions. Watch for signs of fatigue, irritability, or changes in bedtime behavior. If sleep issues persist, start a conversation. Ask if anything is bothering them or if someone’s making them uncomfortable online.

Unexplained Physical Symptoms

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Emotional pain often shows up physically. Frequent headaches, stomachaches, or other complaints without a medical cause can signal internal stress. Kids being bullied may not even realize the connection between their symptoms and what they’re experiencing online. You might hear, “I just feel sick,” without further explanation. These symptoms are real, even when tests come back normal. Instead of brushing them off, explore what’s going on emotionally. Gently ask if anything is making them anxious, especially during or after screen time.

Loss of Interest in Hobbies or Activities

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Children usually pull away from favorite activities when something’s wrong. If your child stops playing their favorite sport, quits a club, or gives up a creative hobby, pay attention. They may have been ridiculed for their interests online or faced criticism that crushed their motivation. What once brought them joy now feels tied to embarrassment or fear. Rather than pushing them back into it, ask what changed. Let them know it’s okay to take a break—and even more okay to return when they’re ready.

Changes in Eating Habits

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Eating patterns often shift under emotional pressure. Some children overeat to soothe stress. Others lose their appetite altogether. If your child starts skipping meals, hiding food, or eating alone, it could signal distress. You may notice rapid weight changes or unusual food rituals. These habits sometimes emerge when kids feel powerless. Food becomes one thing they can control. Instead of scolding or questioning them during meals, offer quiet support. Make food time low-pressure and consistent. If eating patterns don’t normalize, seek help from a doctor or counselor.

Decline in Academic Performance

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Cyberbullying affects concentration, memory, and motivation. When a child feels targeted or humiliated, their mind is elsewhere. If grades drop, assignments go missing, or they stop trying, something might be wrong emotionally. Teachers may notice reduced participation or changed behavior. Kids under stress may also act out, withdraw, or seem distracted in class. Don’t jump to punishment. Reach out to the school for insights. Working together, you can support your child academically and emotionally. Even small improvements start with feeling heard.

Avoiding Friends or Social Events

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Social withdrawal is a major sign. A child who once loved hanging out may suddenly avoid all social contact. They might stop replying to friends, skip group chats, or say no to every invite. This often comes from fear of judgment or embarrassment. Maybe a rumor spread. Maybe someone turned on them publicly. They may feel like no one wants them around. Instead of forcing them into social settings, invite trusted friends over in small ways. Help rebuild their confidence in safe, comfortable spaces.

Self-Harming Behavior or Talk of Hopelessness

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This is one of the most serious red flags. Children facing severe cyberbullying may express feelings of worthlessness. They might say things like “no one cares about me” or “I don’t want to be here anymore.” Others may hide signs of self-harm—scratches, cuts, or bruises. Always take these signs seriously. Don’t wait to act. Reach out to a mental health professional immediately. Keep communication open and nonjudgmental. Remind your child they are loved, valued, and never alone in facing pain.

Receiving Strange Texts or Messages

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Pay attention to who’s messaging your child. Bullies often use anonymous or fake accounts to hide their identity. If your child receives strange messages, especially from unknown users, ask about them. They may seem nervous or tense when notifications pop up. They might delete messages quickly or change their passwords often. Teach them how to block users and report harassment. Explain that you’re not trying to invade their space—you just want them to feel safe.

What You Can Do as a Parent

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Your response matters more than you think. Start by listening—really listening—without jumping in to fix everything. Stay calm even if what you hear upsets you. Validate their feelings and avoid phrases like “just ignore it” or “toughen up.” Instead, say, “I’m here. Let’s deal with this together.” Help them document messages, take screenshots, and report bullies when needed. Get schools or platforms involved when necessary. If emotions run deep, bring in a therapist. Your job isn’t to have all the answers. Your job is to walk beside them.

Teach Resilience and Digital Boundaries

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Start early. Teach your child that not everyone online is kind or trustworthy. Talk about what’s okay and not okay to share. Help them set privacy settings, manage followers, and block unwanted contact. Model healthy screen habits yourself. Don’t lecture—show what good digital boundaries look like. Praise kindness, empathy, and confidence. Let them know that walking away from negativity isn’t weakness—it’s strength. Being online should never come at the cost of peace.

Final Thoughts

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Cyberbullying doesn’t always scream. It whispers. It hides. It waits. But your child’s behavior can tell the story. Watch closely. Listen deeply. Act with love. You don’t need to fix everything overnight. Just showing up, asking questions, and staying present can change everything. No child should feel alone behind a screen. And with your help—they won’t.

Read More: Mom Advocates for Her Daughter’s Right to Set Boundaries at School