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Jade Small
Jade Small
February 14, 2025 ·  6 min read

10 pieces of terribly awful dating advice women give to each other

Dating advice is everywhere, but not all of it is actually helpful—some of it can be downright terrible. Well-meaning friends, social media, and even pop culture often dish out tips that sound good in theory but backfire in reality. From playing hard to get to trying to “fix” an emotionally unavailable man, these misguided strategies can lead to confusion, frustration, and heartbreak. If you’ve ever received one of these classic yet awful pieces of advice, you’re not alone. Let’s break down the worst dating tips women give each other—and why they should be avoided at all costs.

1. Play Hard to Get—Men Love the Chase!

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This advice has been passed down like some sacred dating rule, but in reality, it creates unnecessary confusion and frustration. The idea that a man will become obsessed with you just because you act distant is deeply flawed. Sure, a little bit of mystery can be intriguing at first, but if you’re constantly playing games and refusing to show genuine interest, he might assume you’re simply not into him and move on.

Healthy relationships are built on mutual interest and respect, not mind games and manipulation. If someone is only attracted to you because you seem unattainable, what happens once they “catch” you? A solid connection should feel easy and natural, not like a never-ending strategy game.

2. Make Him Jealous to Test His Feelings

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Some women believe that creating a little jealousy is a good way to see how much a guy cares, but this is one of the fastest ways to destroy trust. Whether it’s casually mentioning an ex, flirting with someone else, or making vague social media posts designed to spark insecurity, all it really does is create drama.

If he gets upset, it won’t be because he suddenly realized his deep love for you—it’ll be because you’ve deliberately played with his emotions. And if he doesn’t react at all? You’ll just end up feeling even more insecure. A healthy relationship isn’t built on petty tactics; it’s built on open, honest communication. If you’re unsure about his feelings, the best thing you can do is ask, not test him with emotional manipulation.

3. Wait for Him to Make the First Move—Always

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The outdated notion that men must always take the lead in dating keeps a lot of women stuck in unnecessary waiting games. While traditional gender roles once dictated that men should always be the pursuers, times have changed. If you’re interested in someone, why waste time hoping he’ll make the first move? Confidence is attractive, and showing genuine interest doesn’t make you look desperate—it makes you look self-assured and mature.

Besides, some men are just as nervous about approaching someone they like, and they might actually appreciate the initiative. There’s no rule saying you have to sit back and wait for fate to intervene—sometimes, taking control of your own love life is the best thing you can do.

4. If He’s Mean, It Means He Likes You

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This one should have been left behind in middle school, but shockingly, it still finds its way into adult dating advice. The idea that a man who teases you, ignores your texts, or gives you backhanded compliments is doing it because he secretly likes you is toxic. If a guy is treating you poorly, it’s not a sign of love—it’s a sign that he lacks emotional maturity or respect.

A healthy relationship involves kindness, care, and mutual support. No one should have to decode mixed signals or endure emotional manipulation just to prove they’re worthy of affection. If someone’s actions consistently make you feel insecure or unappreciated, it’s not love—it’s a red flag.

5. You Can Fix Him

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Many women fall into the trap of believing that with enough patience, love, and understanding, they can transform a toxic or emotionally unavailable man into the perfect partner. But the harsh truth is, you can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change. No amount of nurturing will turn a commitment-phobe into a devoted boyfriend or convince a serial cheater to suddenly embrace monogamy.

Relationships shouldn’t be about “fixing” someone—they should be about mutual growth and support. If someone is deeply flawed, it’s not your job to repair them; it’s their responsibility to recognize their own issues and work on themselves. Instead of trying to heal someone who doesn’t want to be healed, focus on finding a partner who is already emotionally available and ready for a healthy relationship.

Read More: 7 Signs a Relationship is Doomed From The Start

6. Give Him an Ultimatum—It’s the Only Way to Get What You Want

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The idea that an ultimatum is the best way to push a man into commitment is one of the worst dating strategies out there. Sure, it might force a temporary decision, but it’s rarely a decision made from genuine desire. Instead, it often leads to resentment, frustration, and an uneven power dynamic. No one wants to feel backed into a corner when it comes to major life decisions, especially love.

A relationship should evolve naturally, with both people wanting the same things at the right time. If you find yourself in a situation where an ultimatum feels necessary, it might be time to reevaluate whether this relationship is truly fulfilling your needs or if you’re trying to force something that isn’t meant to be.

7. Keep Your Standards Sky-High—He Should Earn You

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Having high standards is great, but turning a relationship into a constant test where a man has to “prove” himself can be exhausting for both parties. If your expectations are unrealistic or rooted in a never-ending list of demands, you may be setting yourself up for disappointment. A strong relationship is built on balance—both partners should bring something valuable to the table.

It’s fine to have deal-breakers and expectations, but if you’re constantly making a man jump through hoops to prove his worth, he may start to feel like he’s never good enough. Instead of focusing on making someone “earn” you, look for mutual compatibility and shared values. A real partnership is about teamwork, not endless trials.

8. Never Show Too Much Interest—You’ll Look Desperate

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Some women are afraid that if they express too much interest too soon, they’ll come off as desperate or clingy. But suppressing your excitement about someone you genuinely like only makes dating more complicated than it needs to be. If you play it too cool, you risk making the other person think you’re not interested, and they might move on.

Authenticity is attractive, and there’s nothing wrong with showing enthusiasm for someone you enjoy spending time with. Relationships thrive on openness, not calculated aloofness. If you like someone, let them know—life’s too short to play guessing games.

9. If He Loves You, He’ll Just Know What You Need

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The romanticized idea that true love means never having to explain your needs is one of the biggest relationship myths out there. No one is a mind reader, and expecting a man to intuitively understand what you want without ever saying it is setting both of you up for failure.

Communication is the foundation of a healthy relationship—if something is bothering you, say it. If you have a specific need, express it. Waiting for someone to “just know” will only lead to disappointment, resentment, and unmet expectations. The happiest couples are the ones who communicate openly, not the ones who rely on silent hopes and unspoken wishes.

10. Never Settle—There’s Always Someone Better

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While no one should settle for a bad or unfulfilling relationship, constantly searching for “something better” can leave you feeling perpetually dissatisfied. The idea that there’s always a more attractive, more successful, or more perfect partner out there can prevent you from appreciating what you already have.

Relationships require effort, compromise, and a willingness to work through challenges together. If you’re constantly looking for flaws or waiting for the next best thing, you may never experience real emotional connection. Instead of focusing on finding someone “better,” focus on building something meaningful with the right person—because real love isn’t about perfection, it’s about partnership.

Read More: 20 Things Men Want In a Relationship